Choosing who will manage your child’s inheritance isn’t just a legal decision—it’s a deeply personal one. The right trustee can offer long-term stability, while the wrong one can create confusion, conflict, or even financial loss. If you’re naming a trustee for your children in your estate plan, this guide will help you make a thoughtful, informed decision.
At The Village Law Firm, we regularly guide New York parents through this process. Whether you’re just starting your estate plan or revisiting one after a big life change, this post will walk you through what a trustee does and common red flags to avoid.
What Should I Look For in a Trustee?
It’s natural to start with the people you trust. But trust alone isn’t enough. Managing a child’s inheritance involves serious legal, financial, and emotional responsibilities—so it’s important to choose someone capable and reliable.
Here are some warning signs that someone might not be the right fit:
- Poor money habits – If someone struggles with their own finances, they may not be ready to manage someone else’s.
- Difficulty working with others – Trustees often need to communicate with guardians, attorneys, and family members.
- Personal conflict with your chosen guardian – This tension can create friction at the worst possible time.
- Unreliable follow-through – Trustees have real duties like filing taxes and handling distributions. This role can’t be taken lightly.
Ultimately, a good trustee should be organized, financially responsible, and willing to follow your instructions—even if they disagree with them. That’s why we often suggest writing a guidance letter to help your trustee carry out your values and priorities.
Can I Name More Than One Trustee?
While you can name more than one trustee, this approach comes with risks. Co-trustees must be able to collaborate effectively. If they don’t get along or disagree on decisions, it can create delays, deadlocks, or even legal disputes. In most cases, it’s cleaner to name one primary trustee and list a backup (called a successor trustee) in case the first choice can’t serve.
What Does a Trustee Actually Do?
Most parents are surprised by how much responsibility a trustee holds. This role isn’t just ceremonial—it’s day-to-day management of your child’s financial well-being. A trustee’s duties include:
- Paying for your child’s education, healthcare, and living expenses
- Managing investments or real estate held within the trust
- Filing taxes and maintaining proper records
- Communicating with guardians and other family members
- Making judgment calls about discretionary distributions (e.g., when your child wants to start a business or study abroad)
If you’re naming a trustee for your children, you’ll want to make sure they understand these responsibilities—and that they’re truly willing to take them on.
How Do I Make the Right Choice?
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer. Some parents choose a sibling, others choose a close friend, and some name a professional trustee, like a bank or trust company. What matters most is finding someone who meets the needs of your family and can handle the role long-term.
Ask yourself:
- Will they be alive and capable during the years my children will need them?
- Do they understand (and respect) my parenting values?
- Can they handle paperwork, legal deadlines, and financial decisions?
- Will they work well with my chosen guardian?
Many of our clients also revisit this decision after life changes—like a divorce, a new baby, or a move. If that sounds like you, you might also want to read Steps for Updating Your Estate Plan After Divorce for more insight.
FAQs
What’s the difference between a trustee and a guardian?
A guardian takes care of your child’s physical and emotional needs. A trustee manages the money. They’re often different people—but they’ll need to work together.
Can I change my trustee later?
Yes. As long as your trust is revocable, you can update your trustee at any time.
Should I name a professional trustee?
If you don’t have a trusted person who meets the criteria—or if your estate is complex—naming a professional (like a trust company or CPA) can be a smart move. We can help you weigh the pros and cons.
Ready to Name a Trustee with Confidence?
At The Village Law Firm, we help New York parents create personalized estate plans that protect their children and clarify every detail—including trustee selection. If you’re unsure who to name or how to structure your trust, schedule a legal planning session to get started.
